MICK’S 20/20 VISIONS OF POLE USES

IMG_4438Obviously, I am a proponent of Trekking poles! I think they could perhaps be the best thing to happen to hiking since hiking boots themselves. Overcoming minor knee issues can present quite the conundrum to wilderness enthusiasts as myself. These things have been my savior in working with my own knee pain. But even if you don’t suffer from knee pain yet, hiking poles can preserve your joints and have you hiking into your 70’s and beyond! I have broken this list down into  2 columns. To the left we have the practical uses. Some are obvious and not so much. And to the right we have many uses I am sure were never the intent of the designer. Each list is 20 items long, but I am sure there must be 1,001 uses for these things. Have fun inventing your own uses and HAPPY HIKING!

Practical Uses (intended or otherwise):

On the Silly Side (some more so than others):

1.       Uphill: sharing the burden with your legs to help muscle you up the slope

2.       Downhill: By far the best use!! Help to control your descent and lessen the knee jarring impact of steep slopes.

3.       Flat or Moderate Grades: Keeping your rhythm consistent, and increasing the pace allowing you to cover more ground and get you to far away magical places.

4.       Traction: 2 more points of contact on slippery surfaces.

5.       Steep Scrambles: Shorten the poles according to the contour.

6.       General balance and stability: I can’t count how many times they prevented a minor slip from turning into a major fall.

7.       Depth Gauge: When unsure, poke the snow, water, mud, brush etc. before stepping onto it.

8.       Ice stability/ Thickness test: similar to 6 above to keep your feet and more dry and warm.

9.       Water crossings: Help with stability when rock hopping or keeping you upright when wading a river in high water.

10.   Snow bridges: stability test similar to 7 for snow-pack bridges over waterways.

11.   Communication: when visible to your group but out of earshot or when signaling for assistance, a predetermined or universal set of signals can be used (ie: with your poles form a + for “break time” or “stop”, wave back & forth for “HELP”, hold out horizontally for “OK”, etc – see universal distress signals: 3, V, X, etc)

12.   Camping gear: Use as a tent pole, deadman, stake or guy point.

13.   First Aid: Use to fashion a backwoods splint or use as crutches in the event of a “usable” injury to self-evac.

14.   Emergency Evac/ Rescue: Can be used with other gear to improvise a stretcher or litter for a more serious injury requiring a rapid evacuation.

15.   Used for Multiple Activities: standard hiking, snowshoeing, cross-country skiing. (should have mentioned this sooner I suppose)

16.   Arm Extensions: to reach high or out of reach places.

17.  Clearing Tool: Assist in clearing the way through brush and dense forest in a bush-whack scenario.

18.   Rest time: Prop yourself upright and lean into the poles to take some of the weight off.

19.   More balanced workout: using more of the upper body than you would without.

20.   Snow Clearing: from weighted leaning branches. They will often spring back up out of the way.

1.       Flag pole: Flags on the 48? Mark your campsite, Or even flagging down search and rescue (maybe not so silly afterall)

2.       Laundry: when trees are not around or are snow covered, use for clothes line.

3.       Wring-out: wrap wet items around pole and twist. (think rubber-band propeller)

4.       Self-defense: As a last resort to scare away bear, dog, or stalker.

5.       Drumsticks: a must for me! (a bear vault container makes a great drum, when empty, and also a seat)

6.       Paperweight: This should really be in the other column. When on a windy summit, trying to read a map, just lay down the map flat on a rock and use the poles to lay on the sides. I have done this more than once.

7.       Partner assist: Up a scramble- from above (reach and pull), or from below (nudge back or butt).

8.       Trash pickup: If bending over is your excuse for not picking up after sloppy non-LNT hikers.

9.       Pick up fallen Pole: ummmm wouldn’t have fallen if you didn’t have it in the first place! Isn’t it ironic? Don’tcha think?

10.   Tri-pod or Selfie stick: another piece of gear to leave at home.

11.   Fishing/Hunting: Survivalists- Backwoods fishing pole or spear. Yup another thing to leave at home! You’ll be an ultra-light-er in no time!!

12.   Campfire Tool: Carefully poke the fire. But don’t ruin your poles!!

13.   Marshmallow Stick? GROSS!!

14.   Culinary Tool: Stir the giant vat of chili. EVEN GROSSER!

15.   Raft Paddles: (self evac – on river)tape or rope something flat to the ends like pieces of a sleep pad .

16.   Games: Backwoods Baseball Bat? Or light saber fights (Luke, I am your… Ok now we are reaching!!)

17.   Snow Art: write out a message or draw a picture. (ok now we’re back on track)

18.   Pole Vault:  across the river or gap. WHAT? Don’t try this at home! (or away from home)

19.   Erotica: Pole Dancing or Sex Toy! (Ok are we about done with this silliness yet?)

20.   And the Most important Pole Use of all:

…….wait for it…

WHACK SOMEONE ACROSS THE HEAD WHO HAS COME UP WITH FAR TOO MANY SILLY USES FOR HIKING POLES!!!!  

 

Many canadian pharmacy levitra online sites even have online experts to answer your queries related to particular diseases. It is an approachable drug just because of its availability on online drugstore and cheapest prices. levitra 25mg This can be done with the proper nutrients and regular cheap online viagra exercise. Several times they are prescribed along with anti-anxiety drugs. see this link professional cialis

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *